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Kentucky! published on

Where the cashier gets openly angry when you say you don’t need a bag.

We went to see thegeekgene in Virginia, where she gave me a cookie, I unavoidably got sick again because there was a fajita, and I accidentally bought apricot kernel oil. (The store clerks all looked very sad because their old building had burned down and thus they were in a new one.)

Then we went to see elongated_tito in New York, where she presently resides with the Aunt and Uncle who have strong opinions about dog training and furnishings. They have acquired a gigantic and froofy new house since last year. I kept getting lost in it, it was like an Olive Garden that had developed a low cunning and a taste for human blood. Their whippet took my bowler hat away from me and waved it in the air, taunting, while I struggled to escape their massive couch, capable of devouring anything, even coffee table books about rock gardens, and hope.

We went to a restaurant where I had some pretty good udon with octopus. I hadn’t realized there was octopus in there, Dad got upset when I went, “they cooked this octopus just right.”