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That guy.

That guy. published on

My habit of getting online before going to work in the morning is in general a destructive one, but today it probably proved beneficial. Because if I hadn’t known about Michael Jackson when I went in today, I might have accidentally spoken Japanese when Goody Proctor told me he was dead. (Japanese like, “What?! Lies!”) She and the Devil have startled me into speaking Japanese once before.

(Goody Proctor felt the need to update me on this because Michael Jackson is on my list of names to use to make sentences with. (“Can I help you?” “Yes, I’m looking for Michael Jackson.” “What’s your sister’s name?” “Her name is Michael Jackson.”) The list goes: the students’ names, my name, the manager’s name, Michael Jackson, Taro Aso, Son Goku, Palkia, and then I start ad-libbing. Please do not ask me to explain this. My methodology was not rational.)

Zip and Zoh were extra-adorable today. I gave them a worksheet instead of their usual coloring sheets, and they swarmed me demanding coloring. (I’m unsure how it is that two six-year-olds configure themselves into a swarm, but it is a skill they all seem to have. A few very dedicated ones can actually form one-child swarms.) Zip may have attempted to climb. Having prepared for this, I had colored pencils for them. They did the worksheet with those, and obviously made every letter a different color.

I did discover that I shouldn’t make worksheets for the smallest kids using Helvetica. The lowercase a’s have the curly overhang, which I’d never really registered before. When I realized Zip and Zoh were carefully drawing out this unfamiliar letter not knowing what it was, I took the sheets back and drew in “normal” a’s for them. I luckily had time to redesign Mr. K’s before his class. Century Gothic appears to be the way to go, unless I can find some font specifically designed for kids to copy.

(Don’t ask me why, though my company is supposed to provide workbooks to go along with the textbooks, I have to make my own worksheets. I’ve been here five months and I’m still too irritated to talk about.)