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Dame-dame! Zettai dame!

Dame-dame! Zettai dame! published on

Today was full of loud, obnoxious middle schoolers. But they were all loud and obnoxious in ways that managed to be cute, so I forgive them.

The windows were all open because it was hot. Naturally, Mee threatened to throw my stuff out them when she lost games. (She never actually did because she is sometimes kinda responsible.) We played a game that used the paper faces – I’ve never made one of Conan, but today I decided to use the Devil’s to represent her. Mee saw immediately that the face was not really her sister: “Conan’s cuter than that!” This is from a young lady who frequently repurposes her homework writing assignments to the important work of maligning her sibling.

Jerkface was finally back today. I was worried that I might have traumatized him, but apparently he was worried he might have ticked me off irreversibly – he was extra-good the whole class, all whispering Ken’ichi and Bonze words they couldn’t get and helping me clean up.

He was still loud and quickly-distracted, because he can’t help that, but he didn’t try any wrestling or shoving the whole class. Maybe I’ve finally gotten through to him on that?

He was asking me a bunch of questions – all in Japanese, of course. He wanted me to explain Alaska to him. This is difficult given his limited English vocabulary. (His problem with Alaska is that it is really big and is not attached to the rest of the United States on the classroom map.) He also asked what my “English name” is. It’s Sarah? You know my name, dude. “No, no, your long name.” It is, indeed, long. I repeated it for him, and added a “the third” to the end. “Whoa! That’s too long!”

After their class (which is my last for the day), the manager came in and asked me to come keep an eye on Leo, whose parents were late picking him up again, requiring that he bug the juku teachers and make a lot of noise.

I can now add Leo to my list of kids who cheat at cards. He lied pretty much constantly when we were playing Go Fish. When the stack was down to six cards and he hadn’t admitted to anything I needed for like seven turns, I said, “You know, if there’s only two players, you shouldn’t bluff at Go Fish.”

“I do not lie,” he informed me indignantly in English. He was, of course, lying. (He doesn’t have what I would identify as a Russian accent in English – he sounds pretty Japanese to me.)

Me having been defeated by his treachery, we switched to Old Maid. When we were down to two and three cards each, he had the Old Maid, and refused to let me draw any other card from his hand. He wouldn’t let go of them. You are subtle, my friend.

In non-middle-schooler-related news:

1) Conan taught Mr. Yodeler the Proper Way To Draw A Melon. There’s only one right way! You’re a bossy child, Miss Conan.

2) Zuzu accused me of being in my thirties, which, obviously, made it necessary that I stop class and write my actual age on the board. (I said, “No, no, no! Twenty-three! Now be quiet!” Cookie observed accurately, “You’re the one who’s being loud.”) Apparently I don’t care what she suggests about my gender, but I do care about the age thing? You’d think it’d be the other way around.

Anyway, youngest sibling – next time you see History Teacher, tell him I apologize for the thing where we thought he was like in his late thirties to early forties.

3) Mr. Sleepyhead is just as bad an ambulance driver as he is a doctor. He stopped to say hi to some dudes. I think he bought some juice, too.

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