snarp’s blog

She was “obese.”

In an interesting psychological twist, this destroys all reluctance on my part to eat the fondant.

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“Show a priestess, and a corset. The piece should not contain any sort of a mechanical host body.”

Courtesy of zarla and the makers of Earthbound… the most meta dungeon-crawl ever.

The only thing you really need to know to understand those screen shots is that ‘Brick Road’ is a non-player character who is obsessed with user-friendly dungeon design, and Our Heroes have encountered his work in the past.

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Now with moderate coherency and rampant guessing!

( Volumes 1 - 8: Many Monsters-of-the-Day )

( Volumes 9 - 12: Syaoran Gets Slightly Spooky )

( Volumes 13 - 14: Everyone Gets Seriously Spooky )

( Volumes 15 - 17: Okay So This Time It’s These Guys OH MY GOD WHAT JUST HAPPENED )

( Volume 18 - current (ch. 155): I Mean JESUS People What NOW )

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Commentary typed while reading chapters 120-150 of Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicle:

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I made korma, Mom’s PayPal got hacked, and I maybe have a throat infection.

Dad got me a Barney ice-cream cake for my birthday. I think it may have been a bootleg Barney ice-cream cake. I’m sitting here trying to decide if eating a piece of it would make my throat feel better.

My period started a week and a half early just to make my birthday special.

I accept all major credit cards and categories of confectionery.

It’s just occurred to me that Dad has smuggled a party into my birthday. He invited a bunch of volunteer builders from the low-income housing group elongated_tito is working for over to the house to use the pool this afternoon. He then forgot to tell Mom, got sick, left all the car windows open during a thunderstorm, and wouldn’t drink the tea he’d wanted because it was all hot.

GANBATTE, OTOU-SAN! Go for the gold! Find a way to run over your own foot with the car! Drop your office’s digital camera in a bowl of potato salad! Accidentally eat something with onion in it!

(I assume he’d actually just forgotten that that particular Wednesday was my birthday. MATA GANBATTE, OTOU-SAN! I will require many exceptionally dangerous electronics if I am ever to recover from this crushing incident of parental neglect.)

I wonder if anyone’s remembered that the pool, like, needs to be cleaned? I have no idea if we even have that vacuum for it anymore, and it was raining and Dad was dead to the world pretty much all day today/yesterday, so I didn’t try and figure out. I should probably go to bed now so I’ll be up early enough to remind people of that in the morning.

1) Reading the same books over and over.

2) Throwing away Dad’s coffee mugs.

3) Looking up people’s Amazon wishlists.

People whose Amazon wishlists you should look up:

* College professors (they want you to buy them research materials and lamps!)

* Science fiction and fantasy authors (they all want the really pretty LoTR box set!)

* People you kind of know whose names you selected off Facebook (they probably don’t realize other people can see the list!)

* Local politicians (some of them have taken them down since last time I tried this! I wonder why! And some of them want a bunch of Shakespeare stuff and nothing else! I wonder if they actually want a bunch of Shakespeare stuff and nothing else!)

4) Developing stomach problems.