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Jesus has this great limited-edition ‘Matrix’ knife

Jesus has this great limited-edition ‘Matrix’ knife published on

My shift Monday, a guy told my supervisor all about his gun collection – and the time, when he was on the police force, that he saw an old man sitting on a porch covered in blood – and then the old man’s wife (who had done it) stabbed him – and in the course of all this I think he might have admitted to falsifying evidence.

Today, the same guy came in in a rabbit costume and hopped around, and then talked for about forty-five minutes about his fondness for such suits, and which ones he was planning to wear at his first con this year. He said he really empathized with Bugs Bunny.

However. This is still almost the creepiest thing that happened tonight:

When your co-worker waits until the older authority figure is safely gone, and then drops the conversation he’s been having with you to ask, “Are you happy?”, and then makes a horrible, patronizing suggestion about your behavior to justify the question, he is about to do one of two things:

1) Make a pass at you.

2) Try to convert you.

As follow-ups to that question, both are equally creepy. When deciding whether it’s an appropriate time to witness to someone, I advise evangelists to consider whether they would come off as kind of a serial killer if they were, instead, to choose that moment to start hitting on the target. If the answer is “yes,” then don’t do it. These are both very personal things. Where you feel like it’d be creepy to intrude yourself, it’s equally creepy to intrude your goddamn religion.

The guy didn’t leave right away, so while he was there looking at my screen, I went on OhioLINK and requested some Tezuka manga. You know, Buddha and Faust, and this thing with “Satan” in the title. Did you guys know Tezuka did a version of Faust? He totally did. I told the guy it was definitely going to be awesome. I mean, look how awesome the Hitler manga was!

Edited a few times for delicacy or lack thereof