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We’ve got a pile of terriers on the screened-in porch right now. One of thegeekgene‘s friends asked us to come get them out of the road near her house, because we have apparently taken over the local animal shelter. There are three puppies and two adults, apparently a little terrier family.

I have named one of the puppies Emperor Vomitorius, for reasons that are very good. Poor little Emperor Vomitorius got very carsick.

We kept them long enough to dip them for fleas, but they’re going to the shelter tomorrow, so if anyone wants a vomiting terrier who is in charge of Rome, speak up now.

Dad bought a laptop to take lawyering with him today. He took me with him to help, because He Knows Nothing. From what the office’s computer guy was saying when this idea first came up, Dad basically just needed something with a wireless connection, so I pointed Dad to the cheapest thing there. He said okay, and we asked the guy to go get one.

The guy came back and said they were out of stock, at which point I suggested we go to a different store, to find something in the same price range.

Upon being placed in a shopping situation, Dad’s brain begins a countdown. None but Dad knows when the countdown will end, and even he knows not where… but when he reaches zero, an item must be purchased. Dad did not want to take the two-minute trip to the other store. He wanted to buy a laptop now. He wanted the one that said “satellite” on the box.

Loud, Cheerful Upper-Class Businessman (Dad): Oh, I like this one here, honey!

Waspish, Ungrateful Daughter With Nasal Voice (Me): You want – do you like it because it says it’s “satellite?”

Dad: Yeah…

Me: Do you know what it means that it says “satellite” on the box?

Dad: No.

Me: There’s no – I can’t even find the specs for this, there’s no little card –

Dad: Yeah, I’m getting this one here, please. This one here, please!

Grasping, Villainous Best Buy Employee: All right, I’ll get it out for you, if you’ll just sign –

Me: No! Stop signing things – I’m calling Mom! Don’t sign anything! Dad

At this point, The Plot Thickens, for the computer that Dad had pointed out to the salesman was not in fact, the “satellite” computer. Dad, presented with the information that he had just asked for a completely random computer, said again, “Yeah, this one here’s fine.”

This laptop turned out to be basically the same laptop that I had suggested to him before, but with a slightly beefed-up processor and hard drive, and more RAM – it was about $200 more than the other. The guy asked us whether we wanted a service plan. I’d had to send in my laptop to be worked on twice, and since Dad is not precisely reverent of his electronics, it seemed likely that he was going to need it, too. He said he didn’t want it. While we were going up to pay, Dad muttered darkly that he wasn’t going to pay $250 for a service plan!

I have basically been ranting the whole day.

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