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I keep *telling* my stomach it’s *fired*.

I keep *telling* my stomach it’s *fired*. published on

Wow. This shirt is not tight anymore. I lost weight.

*looks blankly at box of chocolates*

…And I’m too nauseous to celebrate in the logical fashion.

I guess I’ll go to the cafeteria and see if apples will go down. *Again.*

I had a really complicated dream last night. There were mermaids, a labyrinth, a tin key and a golden key that both opened the same door, but to slightly different places, the ocean rising, the ocean boiling, a cyberpunk sewer with hidden control rooms from which an elderly couple work tirelessly to get the water back where it belongs, clones, I think a plague that kills birds, and a Canadian stereotype with one of those hats, played by Joe Don Baker. He saved the day.

My subconscious is unwontedly sarcastic.